Updates & Hard Work
Dating Christian rollercoaster
Have you been on a dating Christian rollercoaster lately? I’m writing this at the end of February after probably the busiest six weeks that I have had for a long time and a roller coaster of a journey which included my husband losing his mother and the long planned celebration of significant birthday for him, both in the space of a couple of days. In amongst that and a number of other things happening outside of work (not least a long planned for holiday), I was interviewed by a reporter/producer for BBC Radio Wales for a programme that was going to be aired whilst I was going to be away on holiday.
Once the dust had settled on returning from my break and I had settled back into work (and inducted a lovely new member of staff) I remembered the radio interview. I duly found it on BBC Sounds. To my delight not only had a lot of the interview I gave been featured, but one of our members who had got married through us, was interviewed as well. They had their own dating Christian rollercoaster and they were happy to share their story. This was Dawn from Merthyr Tydfil who had married Meirion (from Llandovery) in 2014 – a good while back. Hearing her speak about her life, her membership with us and her marriage on National radio was so heart warming. (If you’d like to hear the interview go to the BBC Sounds app and find the Radio programme All Things Considered which aired on 9th February 2020 and you can listen to the whole thing). What struck me about her story was how disheartened she had been at the beginning of her membership because she thought she was not receiving any suitable matches. Now I am making this point because for Dawn – and you indeed – it only takes one!
It only takes one!
You could have your own dating Christian rollercoaster!
And of course that one did come along – and for Dawn it was Meirion. Dawn was in the early part of her membership when she felt like giving up. Perhaps you feel the same? Take heart then and persevere like Dawn did because you just never know who is out there (or who might join next month for that matter!).
But on that note of wondering who is or might be ‘out there’ you do have to contact people and make an effort! I spoke to a lovely lady today who said she had no intention of contacting anyone we had sent her primarily because she was ‘old fashioned’ and expected men to contact her!
[Men please take note and do realise that many women think this way.]
However I think she is making a big mistake and if you think like her too, please read on. You see perhaps there is a man in her list of profiles who, underneath the picture and written profile, is just the sort of man who would be perfect for her. She can’t see it at this point because perhaps his photos aren’t the best, or perhaps something in his profile has put her off…. But the fact is, if they were to meet and get to know each other, it would be a match made in heaven.
For the sake of one phone call, one bit of personal pride about not contacting a man first, this lady could miss the opportunity of a lifetime and her very own dating Christian rollercoaster. If that was Dawn’s experience then it certainly could be yours. And trust me Dawn isn’t the only one who nearly missed out on her future. We have so many members who have married members through us that so nearly missed out on their future (and I guess a mass who have missed out). I know from talking to many members that this is a hard message to grasp. Yes I know it is hard ringing people – especially if you think you haven’t got much in common. But who ever said dating was easy?
No it’s hard work – and that hard work bit is putting in the effort when you don’t feel like it – when you don’t feel attracted to a profile, when you can’t be bothered to pick up the phone and make that call, and when you don’t want to hear someone say ‘No thanks’. But success comes to those who work hard – it’s a life principle and it is no different in dating. Really what have you got to lose? A little bit of pride, a bit of your time, a few resources?
And of course you have everything to gain – as Dawn made quite clear when she described her own dating Christian rollercoaster !
I’m inspired by the words of Pope Francis this month as Lent begins to fast from things like anger, pessimism, worries etc replacing them with gratitude, hope and trust. Perhaps in your dating journey this Lent you can fast from judgement and be open to contacting everyone we send you.
Bless you in your journey